Santa All I Want For Christmas Is…

SANTA, ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS…

1. Lots of treats.  If possible can you make treats that won’t give me the runs.  Mom doesn’t like picking those mushy poopers up.
2. A new cat brother that will squeak like my other toys do when I vigorously poke it with my nose.  Also, if it’s not too much ask for, I would like that he be trained not to scratch my eyes out when we play.
3. Rawhide chews that don’t cause me hemorrhoids.
4.  I would like my big human sister to like me and want to spend time with me.  I don’t know if your elves can fix her or if I need a brand new one.  Also, make sure she will enjoy taking me out for runs and cuddling with me.
5. I need more friends to play with in my neighborhood.  Bombay is a great friend but he is not always available.
6. A toy that does not self destruct when it comes in contact with my teeth.
7. I would like to speak human.  That will then make me completely
   human.
8. I would like a puppy sister to keep me company while mommy is at work.  I promise I will train her, and play with her, and take care of her, and love her.  Okay, I also promise not to act like I’m the boss of her.
9. I heard a girl on the radio asking for her front two teeth.  I want to clarify that I don’t need those.  I take good care of mine so I still have all of my teeth.
10. It would make me happy if your elves would stop making doggie Santa hats.  Mom always tries to put them on me every year for pictures.  If the elves didn’t make them then she would not be disappointed that I am the only dog on FB without a hat on.
11. I saw a doggie water fountain on TV.  That would come in handy because then I would not have to stand at the sink forever until mom comes to turn the faucet on so I can get my drink.
12. Do you think the elves can work on a smoke alarm that is not so piercing loud when it rings.  The loud noise really, really, really scares me.  To makes matters worse, there is nowhere to hide.  When one goes off, they all go off.  Mom is a great cook but…
13. I see my woof friends playing with Kongs nicely and POOF! A treat pops out.  The Kongs that mom gets me do not give me a treat until I take them apart into little itty pieces.  I don’t mind making the piles of shredded Kong but then I don’t get to play with it anymore.  Can I get a Kong that is not defective?
14. This is my biggest wish of all.  I will gladly give up all the above Christmas wishes and all future wishes if you could possibly bring peace to those families who lost a loved one in the recent school shooting.

Your Good Girl (on the nice list),

Simba

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